“Influence them but do not get infected “, this simply means you should be like medical doctors. Of course, sometimes doctors do get sick. However, the majority of doctors treat us but don’t treat our illnesses.
We are different people; from different families with completely distinct upbringings. We can never be the same.
Our differences and variations are our unique factors.
Have you seen two kids with the same upbringing but different characters?
This further proves that everyone is different. Despite our differences, we all have a general understanding of what is good or bad.
We can all agree that stealing, murder, and other social vices are bad. However, this does not stop people from engaging in these activities.
Now the big question is, what can you do when people around you are committing crimes or engaging in activities that you both know are wrong?
Some people ignore them, and others try to correct them but get infected.
The second question is how can you influence people without getting infected?
It is a skill that takes hard work and practice.
This article focuses on teaching you the steps you can take to influence people without getting infected.
5 ways to influence people without getting infected
1. Walk don’t chase
Most times so many people make the mistake of rushing in to give advice or offer some form of correction.
In some cases, they are faced with resistance while others get infected.
If you notice someone close to you engaging in dangerous activities it is natural to feel concerned.
However, the manner in which you approach the issue might either yield positive or negative results.
One of the best ways to influence people without getting infected is to tread softly.
If you pester the person like honey attracts bees, you will definitely get stained.
Instead, dangle your advice like a worm on a fish line. Attract them to you slowly without exposing your real intentions.
2. Act like you don’t care
When the people you love are doing things that are potentially detrimental.
You can react in two different ways;
- Caution them Immediately
- Pretend not to notice
These two ways have their advantages and disadvantages. Let’s begin with the former;
Caution them Immediately
There is a high possibility that the individual sees no wrong in what they are doing.
When you caution them instantly, they realize the bad in what they are doing and may put an end to it.
On the other hand, cautioning them instantly can cause them to hide. When they hide their real feelings and actions, you will have no idea what they are doing in your absence.
They will pretend like everything is going smoothly but in reality, it isn’t.
Pretend not to notice
A lot of people including me use this skill however, it also has its advantages and disadvantages.
When you act like you don’t see the wrong in what the person is doing. You are silently approving of every single action.
Secondly, if you don’t warn them Immediately they might get into huge trouble. If you had warned them earlier, maybe you would’ve saved him/her.
On the other hand, when you pretend not to notice at first, you are able to collect more information.
Assumptions are not healthy, they can make a case out of something that shouldn’t be.
When you spare some moments to watch closely, you may notice key points or features that can aid you in resolving the issue.
Show them love and care
This is a habit that we all have formed, it is a generally acceptable character.
Praise what’s good and punish what’s wrong right?
There is nothing wrong with this concept however, what matters is the motivation.
When you praise someone at that moment you feel admiration and love for them. However, when you punish them what do you feel? Hatred? Disappointment?
No matter who the person is, it is our responsibility to show them love regardless of their flaws.
The only reason you should correct a person is that you love them. Not because you feel more righteous or morally upright.
Love and care have a strong ability to influence people and endear them to you.
Of course, love is correct, however, it also forgives and cares even in the midst of imperfections.
Be clear about your choices and belief
most times people surrender to external influence not because they have no principles but rather because they fail to establish effective communication.
Communicating our core values, beliefs, and principles with our loved ones is very important.
When people are aware of what you can do and the things you aren’t willing to do. They will have no need or goal to keep persuading you to do it.
Of course, they will try really hard to coarse you several times. However, ensure that you stand firm and hold on to your principles.
At first, they may mock you and make a lot of hurtful statements because they are upset by your refusal.
Give it time, they will come running back to you for advice when the need arises. Then, you can influence them without contracting the infection.
Don’t patronize them
Don’t praise a friend in public and gossip about them behind their backs.
If you do not like what they are doing, talk to them about it. However, if you do not have the courage to tell, Then keep it to yourself.
Don’t pretend to love their character and attitude in their presence, then shame them behind their backs.
This is a very toxic way to live, you can’t claim to love someone in their presence and trash them in their absence.
You have successfully destroyed the idea of influencing them if they ever hear about the gossip.
Influencing people without getting infected is a skill that takes a lot of precision and time to acquire, if it’s too fast it can lead to the destruction of the relationship. It is best that you apply the five tips above.
Practice makes perfect, take it one step at a time.