We have all heard these words “pride kills” and we are likely to have different interpretations for it.
To some it means the destruction of relationships, or friendships and to others it means death “literally”.
Whatever your interpretation is, it is obvious that pride is a disaster that leads to destruction now or in the future.
If this is true, why do people continue to live their lives surrounded with an obscene level of pride?
Perhaps it serves as a shield or provides a sense of comfort, who knows.
Nowadays, a lot of people have a common misconception about pride and self-esteem or self worth.
Yes, there’s a thin line between pride and self-worth but that doesn’t make them the same thing.
Everyday, people cross this line out of ignorance or total negligence.
Also, there seems to be a misunderstanding about the concept of pride and a feeling of achievement or acknowledgment about one’s good deeds.
How can that be when there’s an obvious difference between being proud of your achievements and exhibiting pride.
Could it be that people have no idea, hence the misconceptions?
Keep reading to find out the difference between the pride that kills, self-worth and more.
This article will focus on the following;
- Attributes of pride
- How pride kills?
- The difference between self-worth and pride
- Why you should give up on pride
What is pride
If you ask 10 people this question, you will get 10 different answers.
Everyone will give you an answer based on their understanding of what pride is.
The word pride has so many interpretations, here are six different definitions of pride…
The two first definitions are from the English dictionary
‘The quality or state of being proud; an unreasonable overestimation of one’s own superiority in talents, beauty, wealth, rank, etc., which manifests itself in lofty airs, distance, reserve, and often contempt of others’.
A sense of one’s own worth, and abhorrence of what is beneath or unworthy of one; lofty self-respect; noble self-esteem; elevation of character; dignified bearing; proud delight; — in a good sense.
Pride is a feeling of acceptance or recognition of one’s capabilities and achievements.
It is a way of life. When an individual lives like the whole world answers to their commands and everyone does their bidding. This is pride.
A mental issue characterized by the inability to apologize or feel guilty for wrongs done to others.
A mindset that the whole world revolves around you. It could be a result of societal or environmental factors such as harsh parental upbringing.
From these definitions, we can see that Pride is both positive and negative.
What you are exhibiting could be bad or good, it depends on how you use it, your approach and your intention.
For the purpose of this article, we will focus on the negative definitions of pride.
Our focus is to understand how pride kills.
The 7 top reasons why pride kills
For anyone to say pride kills, there must be a reason or could this be only a figure of speech?
Not at all- the phrase “pride kills” is not a figure of speech.
It is a reality and here are 7 reasons to justify the phrase.
Pride is selfish and self-centered
One of the deadliest weapons of pride is selfishness, a proud person has no consideration for others’ feelings.
A proud person does what they like, how they want to and crush anyone that dares to defy them.
Here’s an example;
A proud man will go to extreme lengths to hurt his wife even if it means hurting his kids to achieve his goals.
If he falls sick, he doesn’t care about how his wife is managing the kids, he wants her at his beck and call.
Nothing else matters to him other than the fact that he is sick and needs all the attention of his wife.
But if his wife ever falls ill, he barely cares.
He leaves the home responsibility for her and goes about his business without a care.
It doesn’t forgive
To err is human and to forgive is divine.
Sometimes it is hard to forgive and that’s understandable.
A proud person on the other hand never forgives, it’s always an eye for an eye with them.
Have you ever hurt someone that’s still holding a grudge for years? They do everything to get back at you no matter how many times you apologize?
That’s a common reason why pride kills.
A proud person doesn’t understand why something as simple as “I’m sorry” should make up for the pain you caused them.
They will try hard to get back at you no matter what it costs.
If you have a proud friend, partner, or relative that you love. It’s best to work hard to avoid hurting them.
If you do, then that relationship might be very close to a sad death.
Pride doesn’t hurt the individual that exhibits it rather those around.
Have you ever worked with a proud team leader at work or in church?
Can you take a minute to recall the experience?
They leave the work for you, sit back and receive the dividends of your hard work.
Most times, they make you feel like you owe them praise for working with them.
You can’t make a mistake around a proud person but they can and of course they find a way to blame you for it.
They use harsh words that cripple your productivity and creativity for a week.
Don’t expect a compliment from a proud person, you won’t get one.
It leaves no room for growth
A proud person is self-engrossed and has no time to look down to notice errors or mistakes.
For instance, someone that always brags about a white shirt may become so focused on the ideology rather than what is.
They pay more attention to what they believe is true rather than what every other person believes or accepts.
You can’t give them advice or correction, with time their skills become obsolete because they keep living on outdated information..
It destroys relationships
Nothing kills a relationship faster than an egocentric behavior.
It takes understanding, love, and respect for each other to build a positive relationship.
Nobody wants to be in a relationship with someone that cannot tolerate, care or forgive.
Pride offers no benefit other than death to your relationship.
If it’s worth saving, then you need to work on killing that pride before it kills your relationship.
Takes but never gives
A prideful person always wants to receive all the praise and never shares accolades with teammates and most times, they did not contribute to the work done.
In a relationship, a prideful person feels like they should always be the receiver.
They want the attention, care, gifts, and every other thing that you can offer but, they offer nothing in return.
It’s always a parasitic relationship with a proud person.
Always leads to a fall
The Bible says the Lord resists the proud and gives Grace to the humble.
This is not a threat, it is reality.
Pride is a gradual killer, it keeps your focus on the wrong things and eventually leads to an untimely and drastic fall.
How does pride affect our relationship?
Pride will always destroy effective communication.
A proud person will not be willing to have a mature or civilized communication with anybody.
Whenever a point strikes a nerve that hurts their self-imposed importance, it resorts to quarreling and arguments.
Quarreling and arguments have never fixed a problem, rather it brings hurt and hate.
Hurt and hate will definitely lead to the sudden end of the relationship.
The difference between self-worth and pride
Self-worth is a healthy belief in one’s capabilities and achievements. Pride is a feeling that the world revolves around you or a belief that you are better than everyone one else.
An individual with healthy self-worth knows how to set boundaries and respect the boundaries of others.
A relationship with someone that knows their worth will be healthy and respectful.
However, a prideful person sets high boundaries but disrespects your boundaries with remorse.
Why you should give up on pride
Pride will only hurt everyone around it and eventually hurt you.
It can lead to the destruction of relationships and friendships.
All the characteristics listed about pride are enough reason to make anyone quit.
There are no benefits associated with pride, make the decision to give up on it.
“Pride kills” not literally but it leads to the death of relationships and friendships.
It will cause you to lose your job or miss out on life-changing opportunities.
Choose to stay humble, but never let anyone trample on your worth.